Thursday, November 5, 2009

Famous Last Words

King Arthur: 'What does it say, Brother Maynard?'
Brother Maynard: 'It reads, "Here may be found the last words of Joseph of Aramathia. He who is valiant and pure of spirit may find the holy grail in the Castle of Aaauuuggghhh..."'
King Arthur: 'What?'
Brother Maynard: '"The Castle of Aaaauuuggghhhh"'
Sir Bedevere: 'What is that?'
Brother Maynard: 'He must have died while carving it.'
King Arthur: 'Oh come on!'
Brother Maynard: 'Well, that's what it says.'
King Arthur: 'Look, if he was dying, he wouldn't have bothered to carve 'Aaaauuuggghhhh'. He'd just say it.'
Sir Galahad: 'Maybe he was dictating it.'
King Arthur: 'Oh shut up!'
Sir Robin: 'Well does it say anything else?'
Brother Maynard: 'No, just "Aaaaauuuugggghhh".'
Sir Bedevere: 'Do you think he could have meant, 'Camaaaauuuuggghhhh'?'
Sir Galahad: 'Where's that?'
Sir Bedevere: 'France, I think.'
Sir Lancelot: 'Isn't there a Saint "Aaaaavvvveeeesss" in Cornwall?'
King Arthur: 'No that's Saint "Ives".'
Sir Lancelot: 'Oh, yes. "Iiiiiivvvveeessss"!'
Sir Bedevere: 'Whooooouuuuaaa!'
Sir Lancelot: 'No no no, it's "Aaaaauuuugggghhhh" from the back of the throat.'
Sir Bedevere: 'No I mean, "Whoooouuuuaaa!" as in surprise and alarm.'
Sir Lancelot: 'Oh, you mean like, "AAAHH!"'

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